


that girl is a B-I-T-C-H

by kennys



Category: South Park
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, F/F, House Party
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-06
Updated: 2018-10-05
Packaged: 2019-07-25 20:01:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,257
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16204658
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kennys/pseuds/kennys
Summary: Heidi Turner just may be the bitchiest girl in South Park and that is really not something Wendy needs right now.





	that girl is a B-I-T-C-H

Heidi’s a bitch. This came as a nasty shock to Wendy back in fourth grade, but now it’s more or less an accepted reality now in senior year. 

Back in fourth grade she was much easier to deal with, an angry overweight bully who could easily be ignored. The popular queen bee she’s become, after shedding the weight and dying her hair a platinum blonde is a whole other level of terrible. Throughout high school Wendy often found herself constantly on the receiving end of Heidi’s taunts and bitchy comments, more than any other student. She had chalked that up to the universe being awful and Heidi being, well, Heidi. 

“I don’t understand why you invited her,” Wendy grumbles to Bebe as she helps her long term best friend with the finishing touches of Bebe’s end of the school year party. It’s the graduation party, their final showdown and set to be more ridiculous and insane than its predecessors. 

“She’s in our year isn’t she?” Bebe points out. “I can’t not invite her. Besides, she’s not that bad.” Wendy glowers and Bebe hastily changes track. “Honey, do you think the helium balloons for here or the kitchen?”

“Kitchen,” Wendy decides. She glances around at their handiwork. Balloons and streamers, flashing lights and a smoke machine waiting to be used, enough alcohol to satisfy a sizable number of stupid teenagers. “Should we go and get ready?”

“Absolutely,” Bebe says, linking her arm through Wendy’s. “Also, I’ve got the most amazing new top that would look so hot on you.” 

The top in question is purple and low hanging and immediately sets off an argument, Wendy arguing that she doesn’t have the tits to pull it off, Bebe countering that she absolutely does. She ends up wearing it with a mysterious push-up bra Bebe has produced in Wendy’s size. It looks good, Wendy begrudgingly admits to herself, but doesn’t want to give Bebe the pleasure. Bebe herself is dressed in a slinky red dress that leaves nothing to the imagination and will most likely render Clyde even more of a hopeless mess than usual. 

They chatter away fondly as they apply makeup, Bebe going all out with bright shimmers and dark contour, Wendy opting more a more subdued look. They’re so caught up in fond talks about the past, excited talks about the future, that the doorbell ringing startles them both. 

“Oh shit,” Bebe says. “How is it eight already? Wendy, be a doll and get that. My nails aren’t dry yet.” 

The first guests of the night turn out to be Stan and his friends, a giant crate of beers tucked under Cartman’s arm and a distinct smell of weed wafting from Kenny. Wendy smiles fondly. She’s going to miss these losers. “Come on in,” she says. “You guys are the first ones here.”

Cartman snorts. “I goddamn knew we were too early. I had to leave my Fortnite game early - “

“I can’t believe you still play that shit,” Kenny says with an eye roll. Kenny’s hand is placed strategically in Stan’s back pocket and Wendy wonders if tonight will finally be the night her ex boyfriend mans up and fucks Kenny, as he’s clearly been longing to all these years. 

“Shut up Kenny,” Cartman says. “I was in the top ten but Kyle kept bitching at me that we were going to be late and - “

“Oh shut up Cartman,” Kyle says wearily. “Can I throw my coat in the sitting room?” he asks Wendy and she nods. 

“Sure. I’ll come with.”

Wendy and Kyle have become weirdly close in the last few months of high school, due to a shared passion for extra circular activities and the shared need to make their voices heard on every topic under the sun. They’re both pretending to root for the other to take the Valedictorian title but both know the other is hoping to win for themselves. It’s a weird friendship but Wendy’s going to miss him.

“You know,” Kyle complains to her, “Cartman’s applying for the same dorms as me. Can you imagine if I was rooming with that dickhead? I’d probably drop out of college.” What with the way Kyle and Cartman talk about one another, it’s easy to forget they’ve been steady boyfriends for the past four years. 

“Oh stop it,” Wendy says. She grabs a couple of cider drinks from the table and chucks one to Kyle as the two of them take a seat “He’s pretty much the worst person in the world and you don’t let anyone forget that, but we all know you’re not so secretly whipped for him.”

“I am not,” Kyle argues at once, his argument weakened significantly by the reappearance of Cartman who immediately sits beside Kyle. 

“Kyle, can I have some of your drink?” Cartman wheedles. Kyle rolls his eyes but complies, letting Cartman have his barely touched beer.

“Whipped,” says Wendy. “Absolutely whipped.” 

The party is picking up steadily, more and more people flooding through the doors. Wendy spots Craig and Tweek practically cuddling one another in a corner, Jimmy entertaining a gaggle of girls with his one liners, Nichole leaning into Token as she chats with Red and Annie. Butters is eagerly telling anyone who will listen about the graduation of his Canadian girlfriend and Clyde is positivity drooling over Bebe. 

It’s shaping up to be a good party. 

She ends up refereeing a game of beer pong between Stan and Scott that Stan wins easily. Kenny catches her eye and winks before grabbing Stan by the waist and kissing him squarely on the mouth, attracting several wolf whistles and hollers. Wendy shakes her head fondly and makes her way to the mostly deserted hallway where her good mood is instantly evaporated.

“God, Stan is such a fag. I can’t believe you went out with him, Testaburger.”

Wendy clenches her fist. “Fuck off Heidi.”

Heidi grins at her, her pink tongue poking out to flash Wendy her tongue stud. “Oops, my bad. Forgot you were a homo yourself. No hard feelings?”

Wendy rolls her eyes. “Oh, just fuck off already. I’m not in the mood.” 

“Too bad,” Heidi says. “Because I am.” 

“What are you talking about?” Wendy demands and then - oh.

Heidi Turner is kissing her. Not just a cute peck on the cheek or even a fond kiss like the one she just witnessed between Stan and Kenny. What Heidi’s doing to Wendy is nothing short of obscene and filthy, all wet tongues and wandering hands. Wendy feels Heidi’s stupid tongue piercing scrape off her own tongue and she can’t hold back a moan that spills out. If she could she’d do this forever.

Heidi pulls back, her smirk plain as day. “Christ Testaburger. You are as slutty as the rumors say.” 

“What the hell was that?” Wendy demands angrily but Heidi just laughs. 

“See you around, Testaburger.” She joins the rest of the party where it seems nobody has noticed what they’ve just done, or even noted their absence for that matter. 

Wendy leans back against the wall and breathes heavily, trying to collect her thoughts. She needs to talk to someone. Like now. She glances to the sitting room where she can spot Bebe and Clyde, clearly consumed in one another. She can’t imagine Bebe will be answering her phone anytime soon. 

She types a contact name into her phone and attempts to gather her thoughts while she waits for him to pick up.

“Hello? Wendy?”

“Kyle,” she hisses. “I need your help.”

**Author's Note:**

> god this ship is such a guilty pleasure but it is SO GOOD


End file.
